HELLO TO ADULTHOOD!!

I was 18 years old when I moved out of my hometown, Guwahati for a hostel life in Delhi. That was July 2009! And now with the successful achievement of doctorate in 2019, I have completed 10 years of hostel life. With each hostel, I had gathered new experiences and made many new friends – some of whom are still in contact with me – and learnt many different things about different places of India. Like every other PhD student (and losing my father in between), I too was faced with the dilemma of whether I should continue with further research and move abroad or look for job in India.

I believe that everything happens   for a reason – we just need to seek what that reason is! Though I had got a postdoctoral position in one of the “white collar” institutions of India, NCBS Bengaluru, I decided to join a teaching job in another city of Karnataka, Mangalore. After a tiring and SOLITARY journey of almost 7 hours (with 2 flight halts in between) from Guwahati, I landed in this city. Honestly, I was not very happy at that point because in that journey I realized how far away I was moving from my family, my people, my culture – this was not Delhi from where one reaches Assam within 2-3 hours. And most importantly, since I suffer from motion sickness, long distance travelling never has any positive impact on me!!

My first sight of Mangalore reminded me of my hometown because it was a lot greener (plus heavy rains were on that time) than the industrial city of Bengaluru. Though I joined my job soon, I was not very happy initially because at every point, was getting rather homesick. And why shouldn’t I - the food, the culture, the language – everything had changed overnight AND I JUST WANTED TO FLEE! But then, this was the consequence of a decision that I had taken on my own for MY future – did I want to end it in a fiasco? As a person who had adjusted in hostels for 10 “younger” years, have I not become enough courageous to work this out on my own?

However, for a student from the past 28 years, a work life can seem a lot overwhelming. As a student, the only thing one has to worry about is the meagre END RESULT. But as an adult, there are a plethora of things – no! not only the teaching job alone but also the repercussions of certain decisions that one has to take solely without any suggestions/consultations! And not only that you have to worry about paying for rent, food, utilities, paying your taxes at the right time and at the same time making some savings (because who knows what the future holds, isn’t it?!!). At the onset, everything seemed to be a lot for me – it made me reconsider my decision – MY DECISION TO BE AN INDEPENDENT, “WORKING “ WOMAN THAN AN INDEPENDENT GIRL “STUDENT.” Was coming to Mangalore going to turn out as a bad decision? And it doesn’t just stop on the huge myriad of responsibilities – you get to see the “FIFTY shades of “NOT GREY” but THOUSAND SHADES OF PEOPLE! Different forms of evil coming in the package envy, jealousy, pride, cunningness – something that you were not exposed to in the protective blanket of “being a student” – start falling upon you all at one! Yet you have to maintain your calmness and composure – because you fear THE CREATOR and you are conscious of your family name/reputation – and you accept these different experiences as a “new lesson” learnt in life.

Now it has been almost 2 months since I joined by new job as the HOD of Science and things seem to be falling into places. As a person who can make friends very easily, it is very surprising that I can term only one colleague out of all as a “FRIEND!”

 I had quoted before that everything happens for a reason – and I have realized now that for me moving to Mangalore was life’s way of telling the 28-year old me “Dr. Ishani, Say hello to adulthood”!